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  • rsdang
    08-29 10:58 AM
    :D We've all been there, but don't like to admit it. We've all kicked

    back in our cubicles and suddenly felt something brewing down below. As

    much as we try to convince ourselves otherwise, the WORK POOP is

    inevitable.

    For those who hate pooping at work, following is the Survival Guide

    for Taking a dump at work.



    *CROP DUSTING* - When farting, you walk really fast around the

    office so the smell is not in your area and everyone else gets a whiff, but no

    one knows where it came from. Be careful when you do this. Do not stop

    until the full fart has been expelled. Walk an extra 30 feet to make sure

    the smell has left your pants.



    *FLY BY* - The act of scouting out a bathroom before pooping. Walk

    in and check for other poopers. If there are others in the bathroom,

    leave and come back again. Be careful not to become a FREQUENT FLYER.

    People may become suspicious if they catch you constantly going into the bathroom.



    *ESCAPEE* - A fart that slips out while taking a pee or forcing a

    poop in a stall. This is usually accompanied by a sudden wave of

    embarrassment. If you release an escapee, do not acknowledge it.

    Pretend it did not happen. If you are a man and are standing next to the farter in the urinal,

    pretend you did not hear it. No one likes an escapee. It is uncomfortable for all involved.

    Making a joke or laughing makes both parties feel uneasy.



    *JAILBREAK*- When forcing a poop, several farts slip out at a machine

    gun pace. This is usually a side effect of diarrhea or a hangover.

    If this should happen, do not panic. Remain in the stall until everyone has

    left the bathroom to spare everyone the awkwardness of what just occurred.


    *COURTESY FLUSH* - The act of flushing the toilet the instant the

    poop hits the water. This reduces the amount of air time the poop has to

    stink up the bathroom. This can help you avoid being caught doing the

    WALK OF SHAME.



    *WALK OF SHAME* - Walking from the stall-to the sink-to the door

    after you have just stunk up the bathroom. This can be a very uncomfortable

    moment if someone walks in and busts you. As with farts, it is best to

    pretend that the smell does not exist.--Can be avoided with the use of

    the COURTESY FLUSH.


    *OUT OF THE CLOSET POOPER* - A colleague who poops at work and is

    Dog-gone proud of it. You will often see an Out-Of-The-Closet Pooper

    enter the bathroom with a newspaper or magazine under their arm.

    Always look around the office for the Out-Of- The-Closet Pooper before

    entering the bathroom.



    *THE POOPING FRIENDS NETWORK (P.F.N)* A group of co-workers who band

    together to ensure emergency pooping goes off without incident. This

    group can help you to monitor the whereabouts of Out-Of-The-Closet

    Poopers and identify SAFE HAVENS.



    *SAFE HAVENS* A seldom-used bathroom somewhere in t he building

    where you can least expect visitors. Try floors that are predominantly of

    the opposite sex. This will reduce the odds of a pooper of your sex

    entering the bathroom.



    *TURD BURGLAR* - Someone who does not realize that you are in the

    stall and tries to force the door open. This is one of the most shocking

    and vulnerable moments that can occur when taking a poop at work. If

    this occurs, remain in the stall until the Turd Burglar leaves. This way

    you will avoid all uncomfortable eye contact.



    *CAMO-COUGH* A phony cough that alerts all new entrants into the

    bathroom that you are in a stall. This can be used to cover-up a

    WATERMELON, or to alert potential *Turd Burglars* - Very effective when used in conjunction with a

    SHIRLEY TEMPLE .



    *SHIRLEY TEMPLE* - A subtle toe-tapping that is used to alert

    potential Turd Burglars that you are occupying a stall. This will remove all

    doubt that the stall is occupied. If you hea r a SHIRLEY TEMPLE, leave the

    bathroom immediately so the pooper can poop in peace.



    *WATERMELON* - A poop that creates a loud splash when hitting the

    toilet water. This is also an embarrassing incident. If you feel a

    Watermelon coming on, create a diversion. See CAMO-COUGH.



    *HAVANAOMELET* - A case of diarrhea that creates a series of loud

    splashes in the toilet water--often accompanied by an Escapee. Try

    using a CAMO-COUGH with a SHIRLEY TEMPLE.



    *AUNT BETTY* - A bathroom user who seems to linger around

    forever...Could spend extended lengths of time in front of the

    mirror or sitting on the pot.

    An AUNT BETTY makes it difficult to relax while on the crapper, as

    you should always wait to poop when the bathroom is empty. This benefits

    you as well as the other bathroom attendees



    ************************************************** ******************

    SOME VARIETIES~



    *The King Poop* - This kind is the kind of poop that killed Elvis.

    It doesn't come until you're all sweaty, trembling and purple from

    straining so hard.



    *Bali Belly Poop* - You poop so much you lose 5 lbs.



    *Cement Block* - You wish you'd gotten a spinal block before you

    poop.



    *Cork Poop* - (Also Known as Floater Poop) = Even after the third

    flush, it's still floating in there. How do I get rid of it? This poop

    usually happens at someone else's house.



    *The Bungee Poop* - The kind of poop that just hangs off your rear

    before it falls into the water.



    *The Crippler* - The kind of poop where you have to sit on the

    toilet so long your legs go numb from the waist down.



    *The Chitty Chitty Bang Bang* - The kind of poop that hits you when

    you're trapped in your car in a traffic jam.



    *The Party Pooper* - The giant poop you take at a party and, when

    you flush the toilet, you watch in horror as the water starts to rise.





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  • file485
    07-08 07:52 PM
    this is so so jittery...

    this is a post where they r actually checking the from and to date of the dependant's i94 out-of-status

    http://boards.immigrationportal.com/showthread.php?t=190778

    guys..who just posted before me...pls read the whole thread, her husband had already filed once for AOS and then they had asked for his W2's for which he dint have..they abandoned that AOS and now trying AOS thru the wife..so basically he is still in the records of INS..maybe he dint reply his RFE or god knows what database INS maintains..





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  • astral1977
    07-14 01:31 PM
    I guess this is the easiest way to become a Senior member. Copy paste the same "personally deduced information" in different threads. If required, create a new thread and paste it again.

    Dude, refrain from doing it.....Doesn't serve the purpose of the forum.

    Cheers.





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  • puddonhead
    06-05 01:32 PM
    >> First off, a house is really both an investment and a home.

    If you look at the historical rate of appreciation vs. the risks involved - I think you will come to the same conclusion as I did - that it is a lousy investment in mature markets like US.

    The scenario is different in India. I believe (based on my assumptions and calculations) that the risk/reward ratio is much more favourable there.

    The intangible value of a "home" is the only reason I will ever "buy" a house here - because it is a lousy investment. For me - that tipping point is when I can afford a starter home for cash (it is a differnet topic that I will take a mortgage even then. If there is any problem with the title - the mortgage company is there to fight for me - so it acts as a second layer of insurance). It should not be as far off as you think if you are ready to settle for a small starter home AND actively invest (rather than spend) the principal payment you would have paid towards your mortgage every month.



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  • learning01
    05-24 11:59 AM
    how can you say that the increase is not fair? Do you know how dependent and hungry these American Corporations, Universities or Research labs are? These are operating on a global scale. Innovation and Entrepreneurship are global traits. That's what these employers are seeking and getting.

    And Why not? A coke that costs about 5 c, the concentrate is made here and sent to China, Vietnam or Africa and sold 10 times more. And part the money comes back to this country, to its investors?

    Come on, you can't be so simple and naive? Grow up my friend. Read a wide variety of subjects. Tune less to the idiot box (TV), that shuts out all logical and analytical human ablities; instead it sways folks.

    The need for high skilled professionals is market driven and need based. Why would one spend atleast 10K to try to get even one H1. In advertising, in Labor Certifications, in foreign recriutment, then bringing him here.

    Brother, nobody does H1 employment for charity or social service. Not in this country. Not in any country. On the contrary. This country has dire need for nurses and other health care professionals. They are getting them here on a straight Green Card, on a silver platter. I am sure you must be aware of that.

    Americans are simply not enrolling in these high risk, hard work professions. period. QED.
    What say you?
    Folks,





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  • whattodo
    07-11 11:49 AM
    My wife (secondary applicant on I-485) started job 1.5 months after her H4 to H1 approval. She needed to wait for SSN and that took 1.5 months. Will that create any issue? I am planning to use AC21 to change job. Will that result in extra scrutiny?



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  • Macaca
    01-20 10:11 AM
    Could Congress Be Waking Up? (http://www.nytimes.com/2008/01/19/opinion/19mann.html?em&ex=1200978000&en=42615f161ac4daf2&ei=5087%0A) By THOMAS E. MANN, MOLLY REYNOLDS and NIGEL HOLMES | NY Times, Jan 19

    AMID the clamor of the presidential campaign, it�s sometimes easy to forget that all 435 House seats and 35 of the Senate�s seats are up for election this year, too. So how should Congress under its new Democratic leadership be judged?

    The public has reached a decidedly negative conclusion, based on Congress�s inability to force a change in policy on the Iraq war and the pitched partisan battles that characterized much of the year in Washington.

    But expectations for seismic change in policymaking after the 2006 midterm elections were almost certainly too high, given the deep ideological differences between the parties, the Democrats� narrow majorities, the now-routine Senate filibusters and a Republican president determined to go his own way on Iraq, the budget and domestic policy.

    Based on our research, the 110th Congress does deserve some praise. In 2007, the level of energy and activity on Capitol Hill picked up markedly. This is not surprising � when the Newt Gingrich Congress, its closest analogue, took over in 1995, the pace of legislative life sped up, too.

    In terms of both the number and significance of new public laws, however, last year�s Democratic majority significantly outperformed that Republican Congress. Only one item described in the Republican Contract With America was signed into law at the end of 1995, while most of the proposals the Democrats announced as their agenda were enacted.

    Democrats, to be sure, aimed lower in their specific legislative promises, but they managed to overcome the many obstacles in their way. Republicans in 1995 shot for the moon and ended up frustrated by Senate inaction, presidential vetoes and a government shutdown that proved politically damaging.

    The new Democratic Congress delivered on the promise of ethics and lobbying reform, and made considerable progress in reining in earmarks, which had exploded under the previous 12 years of mostly Republican rule. In fact, between the 2006 and 2008 fiscal years, the cost of appropriations earmarks appears to have dropped from $29 billion to $14.1 billion. Perhaps most important, Congress reasserted itself as a rightful check on the executive branch, significantly stepping up its oversight on a wide range of important subjects.

    But a less partisan, more deliberative and productive legislative process will have to await a clearer signal from voters in the 2008 elections.

    The chart below shows how the 110th Congress spent its time, and what it accomplished, in its first year under Democratic control, compared with its immediate predecessor and with the Republican Congress that took office in 1995.





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  • wc_user
    04-14 07:09 PM
    We are looking to buy a house and the bank is asking us to put down 10%. How much money is considered safe to have after down-payment if we are buying a home. I know it depends on the situation, but I would like some estimates/ball-park figures.



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  • nixstor
    11-12 08:26 PM
    Amen, brother/sister! Where are these half million people? 500,000 divided by 50 states makes for 10000 in each state (on an average; although I doubt that Alaska and Hawaii have that many, while states like NY, CA, NJ, IL, FL, TX, PA must beat the mean for sure, but still). 6500 ain't enough!


    Ha haa.. I tell you what.. It could be either of these

    1) Its not their preference RIGHT NOW, It will become their preference after some time 2 yrs, 3yrs

    2) They are complacent with what they do RIGHT NOW. H1B worker life style in their native country compared to life style in America. Yeaa.. I am happpy happpy.. 2 or 3 yrs

    3) They live on a day to day basis. Why bother about tommorow?

    4) Whatever! some one will do some thing. If some thing were to happen it will happen.

    Its the last one that I hate, c mon folks.. wake up and do something for your self. I feel that most of the people in these forums have already spent enough time (on avg 3.5 yrs??) waiting and the people not on here are the ones who havent spent that considerable wait of 3 to 4 yrs. Most of the people I see every day are in group 4. They consider IV forums as a great resource to get suggestions for their situation, nothing more unfortunately.





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  • sroyc
    08-06 10:41 AM
    I'm not a lawyer but I think it'll be hard to prove that A qualifies for EB2 given that he/she does not have a Masters or 5 years of experience in a related field.

    Regarding the EB1 spillover - yes, it's a valid question but the fuzziness of the law gives them enough room to interpret it either way.

    Okay lets take your example. A & B are graduates with a Bachelors degree (A is a Mechanical and B is Computer Science). A decides to pursue higher study in Mechanical field and B takes up a Software job. After a year they file for B' EB3 at his work, while A is still at school. A joins a software company (His Masters in Mechanical is worth nothing now). EB2 is filed for A just because he has a Masters, B is also eligible for EB2 by that time. Why can't B get a earlier PD? Atleast B got relevant industry experience. How come A is superior than B?

    Also why should EB2's get the spillover visas from EB1? Do they have a Ph.D? Why can't they allocate spillover visas from EB1 equally between EB2 and EB3?



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  • dontcareanymore
    08-05 02:16 PM
    Good points, but let me put a counter argument. Two people , one is named SunnySurya and the other is named Mr XYZ. Both came to the USA at the same time in 1999. The difference was SunnySurya came here for his masters and the other guy came here through shady means.

    Mr XYZ was able to file his green card in 2002 in EB3 category based on his shady arrangements with his employer, whereas Mr SunnySurya continued to do right and socially acceptable things i.e. studied, got a job and then after several years this big company filled his green card in EB2 category in 2006.

    On the other hand after strugling for several years Mr. XYZ has collected enough years on his resume to be elligible for EB2. Now he want to port his PD

    SunnySurya's PD is 2006 and Mr. XYZ PD is 2002. Now if Mr. XYZ want to stand in EB2 line, I wonder what problems SunnySurya can have???:confused:

    And let me add another twist to the story.

    The Guy with Masters degree is working with a desi sweatshop and convinced his masters (No pun) to file for Eb2 even though his job duties were just dish out code like a high school grad can do. On the other hand there was another guy who was in US for a decade , gone though masters degree and got a very good job in a very good company. He was eligible for EB2 but his only mistake was to not force the company to file a EB2 case or even worse his lawyer makes a mistake and files under Eb3 even though the job he was in and he are qualified as Eb2. The company wants to make amends now by filing a EB2 case and first MS guy (sweatshop guy) wants him to start again and wait for another decade.

    The kicker : The sweat shop labor guy works in the same company as contractor and reports to the second guy and in the same reporting chain, just two levels below him.



    How about another story :

    Both guys go to the same engg school back home. One guy passed with distinction and got a job immediately in a respectable company immediately. Other guy takes two additional years to finish the degree , but his dad was rich enough to send him to the US to complete the MS and now he thinks he is smarter than every one else and needs a special place in the queue.


    You can come up with 100s of stories if not more. Therefore you can't generalize. Just don't think all those who filed under EB2 first are with MS and smarter than others and all those who are Eb3 are here by shady means.





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  • nojoke
    04-15 06:17 PM
    I suggest you stop looking at national level figures if you are seeking accurate information. Look at the specific neighborhood you have mind and you may find that the situation there is not exactly what is shown on CNN.

    As an example the DFW area is doing alright inspite of the gloomy picture painted by the media at the national level. Used homes will take longer to sell, but it is nowhere as bad as Florida or CA. And we are not discussing selling here anyway...we are discussing buying.

    http://www.nytimes.com/2008/04/14/business/worldbusiness/14real.html?_r=2&ex=1365912000&en=5fc0b58ba0e5df8f&ei=5088&partner=rssnyt&emc=rss&oref=slogin&oref=slogin
    Now it is global.:D. India has started seeing decline too. After all a ponzi scheme is still a ponzi scheme wherever.



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  • Macaca
    02-21 05:24 PM
    War on middle class is nothing less then a national crisis.

    I was listening to find out the exact statement they use: CNN is the best news on network. Turned off immediately.





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  • learning01
    05-25 06:57 AM
    retrogression is there was no unified voice to atleast speak out, when the serious problems that the legal immigrants are facing was anticipated, write about these issues. Now we have one in IV.

    The only problem in what you advocate is this: while each of us is free to speak as we like, that dilutes our focus and produces a gaggle of voices. This results in lack of attention and gradual erosion of the effort. We don't have a full time paid director / administrators to brings things to order. All work here is at IV is voluntary. That's why we need to stop people from promoting Lou Dobbs. Remember, one swallow doen't make a summer.

    Also remember: these channels have (or may have) an hidden agenda. Rather than pure news and opinion disseminating channels, they are jockeying to be a opinion influencing channel. That's where they fail; when they can't convince people (how can you, in a few minutes of news coverage), they confuse poeple.

    Please do not focus on what Lou Dobbs is saying. If you think this is something that may bring harm to our goals just ignore it. No reason to get rude. Everyone has a right to express his/her opinion. We are in America so we can speak freely.
    It is all fine. Whatever others do say there is a reason behind it. It is either to support or not to support whatevere is being discussed. Some are very good at chosing the words to blur their intentions. Be smart! Read and conclude. Reply without showing your emotions as those may use against us. This is as simple as that.

    regards



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  • mrow
    07-07 10:34 PM
    Don't waste your time there. I too had applied for EAD renewal in March, and it expired in the end of June. Contacted the local office but they said they could'nt do anything. Got my 485 approval 2 weeks before our EADs expired! I had even contacted a senator out of desparation when the USCIS had pushed the EAD processing back by 6 months and with a mortgage payment, baby and with no unemployment benefits that would have been hell. Your best bet at this point is your senator and a good attorney. Don't worry about the attorney fees - it will be worth it in the end. Good luck, I feel for you.





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  • desi485
    08-05 11:36 AM
    This person hiding behind the user id "Rolling_Flood" is an extreme selfish person. The whole idea of our community is to help each other and to provide support & guidance to each-other. Instead he is trying to stop others from getting this advantage, trying to make us believe that EB-2 is his birth-right. I am in EB-2, but I do not support this selfish fox, he will harm the IV community exploiting 'divide & rule' policy. :mad:



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  • nojoke
    05-04 02:13 PM
    House...forget it......


    It will never reach those highs again...

    In US..RE is done.

    Not 485...look at the number of foreclosures.....and inflation.....

    untill the war is over...forget...

    I saw a news article that says Bangalore real estate is down 20% this year. And another one that says Delhi is down 20%. What happened in India is also a part ponzi scheme. All the NRIs buying at whatever prices. How can any local guy afford at those prices:confused: Unless inflation goes sky high and wages multiplying to catch up with the inflation.
    If I buy a flat in Bangalore at 50 lakhs and expect 15 thousand for the rent, it comes to 2 lakhs approx. a year return. If I do a fixed deposit in the bank at 10% interest, I get 5 lakhs return. I can rent for 15 thousand and invest the 3 lakhs back into a fixed deposit. Over the years, flats depriciate and in 20-25 years it will be close to valued at nothing. Where as a wise investment in the bank would have multiplyied by 4 times. :(





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  • new_horizon
    01-06 02:49 PM
    Israel is fully justified in responding to the rocket attacks from Gaza. How long can they show restraint by not responding to the unprovoked attacks. Do you think US will remain silent, if Canada were to lob rockets into US. Asbolutely not. Every country has the right to protect itself.
    Hamas is such a coward orgn that they hide behind school, mosque, hospitals to shoot their rockets, so they really are luring israel to bomb those areas. Unfortunately innocents die...the blame should be on hamas. In fact, before bombing Israel even goes to the extent of calling and texting people in the target area to warn them before bombing. which country at war you know does that. Inspite of all these the biased media portrays Israel as the evil one. time to think. if only india shows some courage like that.





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  • mpadapa
    09-26 01:14 PM
    Just to clarify GWB is a Yale graduate.
    With a democratic controlled congress and Obama being a president, CIR is bound to happen. If high-skilled community doesn't unite and get our voices heard then we might come up empty. Remember the last time an immigration bill was passed by the Democratic president (AC21). They flashed few carrots (2-yr recapture, portability and H1 extension beyond 6 yr) and threw us under the bus with flood of 245i applicants. EB3 queue is still suffering from those backlogs.

    In the near term only democrats will be in a position to provide us with some relief because they control the congress.

    "I have no doubt in my mind that a Harvard graduate can get USA out of this economic turmoil. ":)
    i had to chime in, sorry but GWB is also a Harvard graduate. Only a Harvard Business graduate can get us in this turmoil ? :)

    Obama might be good, i dont know, i have yet to see a some good bills from him or concrete actions, but people like him and in the US perception and media support is everything. I think he will win. If might not be good for us because of the following
    a) Sen Durbin, is anti H1 and also anti GC (IMO)
    b) Massive support from labor unions. Just reading some of the statements from the the unions who support him indicate that they will want their pound of flesh after the elections. Watch out for those changes.
    c) If the democrats get a majority then there might be a chance (Reps dont have a chance of getting a majority), if the congress stays divided then the opinions are sharper and the same thing will happen again.
    d) CIR had little if any EB benefits, it was mainly for the illegals...we were simply added due to actions from IV and the rest.





    kuhelica2000
    12-28 03:35 PM
    So Mr. Trained Reservist,
    Let's say the war is won in 15-20 days based on your expert knowledge, what is next? India occupies Pakistan? and acquires 160 million muslim population along with Talibans? You think that will end terrorism and riots in India?

    Oh BTW, there is another trained reservist in the history who claimed Iraq war would be won in two weeks. Do you know who he is? Hint: he became the worst president in the history of the US.

    As someone who comes from an army family and who has been trained as a reserve, I want to assure you guys who think that an Indo-Pak war will linger; that it will not. It will take Indian army 15-20 days to reach Islamabad if the full force is deployed and the army is in charge of the war and not our politicians.
    Pak has nukes, but their delivery mechanism is not sound and before Pak launches any nukes, US will disarm them and even if a few are launched India had a very good anti missile shield which will intercept and destroy all warheads before it enters Indian air.
    Now to actual strategies that India should follow-
    1. The civilian government in Pak is not at fault, previously they were responsible for terrorist attacks on India but now they are suffering at the hands of a monster of their own making. Terrorism and ISI.
    2. India should use air and missile power to strike out and wipe out a 500km radius around each terrorist camps while offering an olive branch to the Pak govt. What this does is it will kill with certainty all terrorists and will also wipe out surrounding villages.
    3. These are casualties of war and are a necessary evil, it will strike fear in the hearts of villagers and when ever a terrorist camp is set up; the surrounding villagers will chase them out in fear of India's wrath.
    4. India should send RAW analysts to assassinate all rouge ISI officers, if needed Mossad of Israel can help India.
    5. Finally the only way to deal with the problem of Pakistan longtime is to either socially cleanse Pakistan for the civilian government and bring in more modernism or carve out pakistan into several independent states. This is a long term goal which has to be thought about.

    If anyone is interested I can post the actual army strengths of India and Pak, its an interesting statistic and I am sure the Pak government knows about it in more detail than me. And it beats me that in spite of knowing the facts they are doing all this war posing. Just a tit bit from it, Indian army (only) is 1.3mil + 450K (reserves) strong. The combined Pak armed forces are 450K active + 500K reserves. India outnumbers Pak in almost every aspect 1:5 on an average. We have fought 4 wars and India has won all 4 times, why should the 5th time be any different? Lets finish this and move on, we have to become an economic superpower and we cannot be bothered by such trivial things like terrorism and pakistan. Lets take terror to the terrorists, like the song from the Hindi movie Arjun goes
    " Dushman ko yeh dikadho dushmani hai kya...":cool:





    NKR
    08-05 08:37 AM
    The said person should have been aware of what he or she was getting into. Blaming your hardship on other people and trying to get mileage out of it is hardly an honest way............would you agree?


    Were you aware of each and every rule in the immigration law book before you applied for GC?. Did you foresee this delay before you got into this mess?.

    Shouldn't you have been aware of this option of EB3 people converting to EB2 and accounted for that when you filed your GC?. Aren;t you blaming your hardship on EB3 people and getting mileage out of it?.



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